Free Speech in the "Labour" Party

Click here to see what happens when a highly dangerous 82-year old tries to disrupt Jack Straw's speech by making the (entirely reasonable and astute) observation that the aforesaid's defence of the invasion of Iraq has been, and is, a load of bollocks...

In an era when 'modernisation' has become a mantra for 'New' Labour its nice to see that some old traditions from the Stalinist era are being kept alive...

Three cheers for Comrade Straw...

Apparently the 82 year old was held afterwards by police under "terrorism powers" when he tried to re-enter the building - something to remember when 'Big Ears' takes to the podium to talk about ratcheting up police powers...

Oxford Notes from Yearly Impressions

Well I'm finally here - and it's raining.

Definitely a different vibe to LSE; there are actually green fields at the back of my college - although there were some home comforts (eg. got my fees bill before I'd even arrived)...

Not really an organised freshers week (yet at least either)...so LMH is pretty quiet (dunno where the other BCL students that are meant to be are)...having said that, life been pretty good so far. Monday night went to the pub with one new arrival (New Yorker who ran Kerry's campaign in NY state...always good to meet a fellow Bush-phobe) and the MCR rep, a vaugely scary (but very interesting) academic type who specialises in biblical prophecies...yesterday had a VERY tedious half hour talk about the wonderous mysteries of the library catalogue - made up for by going to the pub afterwards with a load of fellow BCL students (including a few potential fellow alcoholics, something I was very relieved to see)...also met a random bloke who I hadn't seen since LSE (guess academia really IS a small world)...today ? Met my college tutor (nice) - and hopefully drinking either here or down at Lincoln college later...

Oxford is a really beautiful city with lots of nice buildings, interesting dark alleys and - naturally - pubs...

Early days but I think its gonna be a good year...

State of the Union

Check out the current free download at the Itunes (UK) store...lyrics are brilliant.

State of the Union, by David Ford.

Wake Me Up Before September Ends

“Wake me up before September Ends”…

Another summer in Bumblefuck passes…tomorrow I head off into the deep blue yonder where only virgin trains fear to tred (well, to Oxford anyway)…yep, I’m finally going to rah land to do an LLM (typically called something poncily different – well this is Oxford)

To be honest, I’m slightly apprehensive (as well as obviously being excited) about my forthcoming year; the other day I got an email from an old friend at LSE (now in Zurich working for a “think tank” – or at least cleaning it out periodically) asking me to let them know my impressions of Oxford from the point of view of someone who’d lived in London for three years ‘because I don’t think I could do it’…

This is essentially the problem…no Covent Garden, no Brick Lane, no Camden Town, no Hampstead Heath…however, I am not (that) scared – the likes of live music in Camden and The Cross (one of the best clubs in town) are only about an hour away by Oxford Tube…

And I am excited…new place, new people, a chance to wake up to something other than police sirens etc – plus apparently Oxford has nice pubs…

If all else fails….

I’m pissing off to Goa in three months…aint life hell !

Tottenham

10 Internationals

5 England Players

1 -0 : to Grimsby Town.

I love the Mickey Mouse Cup...

To be fair to Spurs, they were playing away :)

When in a hole...

You would have thought that Dubya had dug such a deep hole for his family's political ambitions that other family members would stop adding to the trench themselves...

Not so.

On seeing the large number of refugees crammed in the Houston Astrodome, Barbara Bush was heard to comment :

"What I'm hearing, which is sort of scary, is they all want to stay in Texas. Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality," she said during a radio interview with the American Public Media program "Marketplace." "And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this is working very well for them."

So that's all right then - it would be very sad to see George W's beloved Texas swamped by the poor and homeless of Louisiana.

You have to hope that the majority of the electorate might identify more with the victims of Katrina than the person one commentator has already dubbed, America's "Marie Antoinette."

Beheading en mass of the Bush dynasty is perhaps a little too much to hope for - but hopefully the voters (at least those who haven't been illegally disenfranchised) will tajke the opportunity to turf out George and Jeb at the next opportunity.

P-P-P-Pick up a Message from God ?

You could have been forgiven for thinking that recent weeks haven't gone particularly swimmingly (no pun intended) for the American far-right; their man in the White House has radically increased the Democrats' chances in the south in 2008 thanks to his appalling response to Hurricane Katrina (although given the Democratic penchant for organised incompetence its perhaps a little too early to tell)...over on Capitol Hill it looks as if Rehnquist replacement on the bench might not be the unabashed bible-bashing hellfire-and-brimstone character they had expected Bush to appoint...

However all is not lost...a new film has just come out which - while just a simple nature film to you and me - apparently is clear evidence of 'intelligent design' and epitomises good ol' fashioned American family values.

The French made film (see, maybe these cheese eating surrender monkeys have SOME redeeming qualities) tells the story of a flock of penguins migrating hundreds of miles to their breeding grounds in the depths of the Arctic winter...one right wing pundit described it as :

"'the motion picture this summer that most passionately affirms traditional norms like monogamy (it is unclear whether the penguins had been vetted for marital fidelity), sacrifice and child-rearing'. Speaking of audiences in America's heartland who often feel snubbed by liberal Hollywood, he added: 'This is the first movie they've enjoyed since The Passion of the Christ. This is The Passion of the Penguins."

As if this response wasn't ridiculous enough, it goes on...

"That any one of these eggs survives is a remarkable feat - and, some might suppose, a strong case for intelligent design. It's sad that acknowledgment of a creator is absent in the examination of such strange and wonderful animals. But it's also a gap easily filled by family discussion after the film." (or alternatively in one of Mr Blair's excellent faith schools)

Naturally at this point you groan "the pro-life lobby will be trying to get in on the act next" :

And sure enough :

an opponent of abortion wrote that the film "verified the beauty of life and the rightness of protecting it"...

Unfortunately all is not quite hunky dory in this theocratic utopia of Pingus...the voiceover to the film contains the words, "for millions of years" - as any good bible-basher knows, the Earth is only a few thousand years old. Still, no-one's perfect...

The Good University (Extremist Groups) Guide

As a new term starts and thousands get used to the student lifestyle (or, at LSE, the Gucci lifestyle), a new report (admittedly written by someone from Brunel - so maybe we don't need to be THAT worried) has just been published warning of 'extremist groups' infiltrating our country's campuses and subverting young minds.

Below is a handy "cut-out and throw away" guide to what you can expect from YOUR university.

Birmingham (Islamist)
Brunel (BNP, Islamist)
Cambridge (BNP) (MI6)
City (Islamist)
Coventry (Islamist)
Cranford Community College (Islamist) (The Who The Fuck Are We Society)
Derby (Islamist)
Dundee (Islamist) (The Scottish Liberation Army)
Durham (Islamist)
Greenwich (BNP)
Imperial College (Islamist)
Kingston (Islamist)
Leeds (BNP, Islamist)
Leicester (Islamist)
LSE (Islamist) (The Alternative Careers Society) (The LSE Conservatives)
Luton (Islamist)
Manchester (BNP, Islamist)
Manchester Metropolitan (BNP)
Newcastle (Islamist)
Nottingham (Islamist)
Oxford (Animal rights extremists) (MI6)
Reading (Islamist)
Salford (BNP)
South Bank (Islamist)
SOAS (Islamist) (The Anti-Cannibis Alliance)
Sussex (BNP)
Sunderland (BNP, Islamist)
Swansea (Islamist) (Plaid Cymru)
Wolverhampton (Islamist)
York (BNP)

So there you have it...

I can't help that Oxford is slipping down the rankings with 'animal rights activists' - hardly in global terrorism's premier league after all...

Corporate Shennanigans

Well that's me done for training contract interviews...no more smart suits and less-than-smart bullshitting.

Have successfully leased my soul to a major (ish) law firm for a couple of years of care-free loan-sustained living.

Bring on Oxford....

Avoiding Arrest - A Practical Guide

Generally speaking, if a UK court issues an arrest warrant, the subject of that warrant will find themselves enjoying the warm hospitality of his/her local police force...

Thus when a UK District Judge authorised the arrest of Israeli General Doron Almog for breaches of the Geneva Convention in the occupied territories (a criminal offence under the Geneva Convention Acts 1957), and his plane landed at Heathrow, one would expect the Met's finest to appear...

Instead, El Al staff whispered at the General to hang on - the next thing is the Israeli Military Attache turns up (how/why he was allowed through the security at Heathrow is unclear) and advises him to hot-foot it back to Israel as he is about to be arrested...as sure as night follows day the plane takes off into the sunset.

Safe back in Tel Aviv, General Almog issues a statement saying he has done nothing wrong; later a "former" legal adviser to the Israeli embassy comments :

"Courts in organised countries do not act on malicious litigation and this was definitely malicious litigation."

Flattered as I am that he considers my country "organised" (presumably he was paid enough money to not have to take public transport anywhere), it is frankly not for a foreign embassy to

a) help its citizens avoid criminal proceedings in the host country (this is in all likelihood a criminal offence under UK law and, while the attache will have diplomatic immunity from prosecution, we tend to invite diplomats who break the law to bugger off post haste)...

b) make judgements about what is, or is not, a mallicious prosecution; this is for the judge and jury to decide; if the General really did do what was necessary to combat terrorism (as he claimed in a statement), he can expect to be acquitted - amazingly enough, we understand terrorism in this country having just lost over 50 people in a series of horrific bombings.

Human Rights

Met a lawyer the other day who was acting for a certain government which, to put it nicely, hasn't exactly got an A* in GCSE Human Rights Protection.

Apparently his client is utterly fascinated with the concept and curious why lawyers and judges in the west place such a high premium on them...

Oh dear.

BBC v New Labour (Away Leg)

The Today programme (and, in particular its anchor John Humphrys) is in trouble again...

Our John's been caught making some fairly unjudicious (and extremely funny) remarks about a load of Labour politicians at a talk given to business leaders (which one suspects he was well paid to do)

Apparently Gordon Brown is boring, Peter Mandelson is universally loathed and John Prescott is "a joke"...Pope Benedict is also described as "a Catholic".

I in no way endorse this scandalous attack on decent honest politicians working hard to make a difference in this cynical world we live in...

However if you did want to watch a video of his comments, click the following link.

Kissel Case

Heading for a long stretch in the slammer....